People would tell me before I came on my mission, "You know you don't HAVE to go on a mission" "It's fine if you want to stay and go to school" "Are you sure? Maybe you'll change your mind when it gets closer, you have time" and I would tell them that it was Heavenly Father's decision and it wasn't going to change. While being here on my mission, I've realized that it was me who made the decision to serve. Yes I received a strong feeling from my Heavenly Father that I was supposed to serve and I couldn't deny that impression, but it was me who made the decision. Before this life actually. I'm sure I had a conversation with Heavenly Father about serving. I'm sure he told me how hard it would be and how amazing it would be and I know he let me make that decision myself. I'm sure I was excited because I knew all the amazing things I would experience and He told me he would remind me again when I was on Earth that this was the path that I had chosen to take.
I know that I am supposed to be here. I know that the people I have met recently are supposed to be in my life for a reason. I know that I was called here to Albania for a reason and I can't deny it.
I want to talk a little bit about decisions and the effect that they have on us.
There is a wonderful member in our ward. She comes to church every Sunday, is always willing to help us with lessons, and she is an amazing teacher. She is an example to the church and the ward and I believe she somewhat holds it together. You wouldn't guess it, but she has been through more than I could ever imagine going through. Sister White and I went to her house this week for a lesson and she shared a story with us that changed me forever. When she was younger she had what I would say is a great life. She had two kids, a 9 year old boy and a 7 year old daughter. Her relationship with her husband was good and they were happy. Then one day it all changed. Her 9 year old son got hit by a car and was killed. It broke her obviously. If that wasn't enough, her husband got sick around the same time and passed away soon after. There she was. A struggling widow and mother with only her daughter to live for and at that point she didn't want to live. She questioned how she would ever get through this trying time alive. Then she found the Gospel. She decided to act on the knowledge she had and be baptized. She found her strength in Heavenly Father. She could have given up. She could have stopped trying and been miserable the rest of her life. She could have decided to do nothing and wallow in pity, but she didn't. She kept going. Heavenly Father didn't bring her son or her husband back to life, but he strengthened her so that she could live without them. (at least for this life) She kept pushing because Heavenly Father gave her strength in her hard times. She relied completely on Him because there was nobody else she could rely on and in doing so she found her strength.
I have realized most on my mission that I can do hard things, but only with His help. I've been pushed and tried these past 7 months more than I have my entire life and I know for a fact that I wouldn't be able to get through any of this on my own. I can choose to give up, or I can choose to rely more on my Heavenly Father. I find strength knowing that I have a Savior who has been through what I have. That he knows exactly how I feel and how we all feel. Which reminds me of one of my favorite hymns I Stand All Amazed'.
"I stand all amazed at the love Jesus offers me, confused at the grace that so fully he proffers me. I tremble to know that for me he was crucified, that for me, a sinner, he suffered, he bled and died. OH it is wonderful that he should care for me enough to die for me! OH it is wonderful, wonderful to me!"
"And Jesus looking upon them saith, with men it is impossible, but not with God: for with God all things are possible."-Mark 10:27
I love you all and I hope you have a fantastic week. Remember that you're not alone no matter what it is that you're going through. Me shume dashuri- your motra
|"Futbol this morning with my favorite people! |
Killed it on the soccer field!!!"
|"Thumbs up for tan lines ♥" HAHAHA!|
|"Made some cookies with the amazing L family for Motra White's birthday!"|
|"We get into our cookie making. This is some serious business ;)"|
|"We had to get creative with some of the ingredients because we didn't have them all haha |
Substitute for oats...pretzels. Substitute for chocolate chips...candy bar and chopped walnuts.
Getting creative over here in Albania :)"
|"Selfie for my lovies back home!"|
|"My new boyfriend" THIS IS JUST CREEPY...|